I will live through all the wrongs with Your Truth.
I will trust through all the wait with Your Word.
I will see through all the pain with Your Love.

•djane•
03.08.2018

he

And he is the calmness in the chaos in me. The clarity of my hazy mind and the the certainty of my changing heart.

•djane•

Alone

Previously I have called Lent the “white space”, the “white noise” of God, the period where winter turns to spring and it becomes cold and eerily quiet, it’s beautiful yet eerie.  This time, the battle rages on but our God is ever faithful.

I have been struggling internally with all the emotions and delusions I have – of the deceit and lies the devil feeds my mind.  I am unwanted, I am alone, I am made to be alone in this world, I will not find love, I will forever be left behind – name the lies, the enemy has it.  Yet, God, in His loving mercy and almightiness knew beforehand what will happen and has sent forth the weapons and help for me.  Well, He could have just stopped it but He didn’t, like with Job’s story.  And as for me, I could let the enemy fill me with lies and not use the weapons God has been providing me.

Yet here we are, here I am.  Faced with all these lies and deceit, God has been feeding me with my dose of Daily Bread, with His Word of Truth and Mercy.  It’s not easy, it sounds  Continue reading

La Madrugada

Es en la madrugada
Aquí en el momento
Mi corazón, en silencio
Palpita en Tu gracia
Laté para Ti

© 02.10.2018

Distractions.

They abound.

May I have the wisdom to discern which to entertain and which to block.

And through it all, there is one which stands – somehow I find that you are my favourite one.

Write

Write
Even if it breaks you
Write
Even when you can’t
Write
About the noises
About the silence
The chaos
And unspoken words

Write
In your sadness
Write
In your gladness
Write
About the pain
About the triumphs
The laughter
And the tears

Write
No matter what
Write
No matter when
Write
Because you are
Because you feel
Because you see
Because it’s real

© 12.19.2017 23:50

Prayer

Never under estimate the power of a prayer.  At times, we need to look outside of ourselves to see how God works His wonders.  We tend to concentrate too much on our needs (humanly speaking) without realising the spiritual need that God is fulfilling in each of us every moment.  We tend to think that our prayers, to be fulfilled, has to be met in our conditions, yet God’s thoughts is not ours to fathom.  And in His great mercy, He doesn’t meet our conditions but always provide us our specific needs.

To be used by God to help others is not a cause for us to boast but it is humbling and unworthy of us to play a part in salvation’s history and what a grace that He finds us to do His will.

Even if we disregard the prompting of the Spirit, the other’s prayer will be answered in His ways beyond what we can imagine. Yet to be able to follow the prompting of the Spirit is not by our own strength but that which the grace that God gives us, the heart that He molds and moves.

All prayers are effective as God hears them and He moves heaven and earth to fulfil His will.

02.10.2018 00:09

 

I go…

Why these words
Why these thoughts
Why such revelations
This mind has to hold
Why stir this heart
Why chosen apart
Why such emotions
Where do I start

What step to take
How far to go
Where forth I don’t know
This road I follow
Swayed by the wind
Lost in the spin
I falter and fall
Yet you gave it your all

Lean on the Wood
Rest on the Rock
Lay on Your feet
Saved by Your blood

© 05.09.2017 23:28

Jesus Owns You

In the Philippines, especially in its capital Manila, the roads are filled with these rowdy jeepneys – the engine sound, the sudden stops, the blings and stickers on their bodies.  As a driver, you would want to stay as far away from them as possible which is an impossible feat in the metro.  These jeeps would often have names written on their body or hanged on the back, sometimes stickers of zodiac signs, artwork, or the face of Jesus, others hang signs like “God bless our trip” or some pinoy hugot or humor quotes.

As I was done with my first trip this morning and on my way to the second one, I was already getting cheesed off with the bad Manila traffic, the buses and pedestrians, the chaos so early on a Monday morning.  And it’s a Monday.  Half-way to my second destination, this jeep cut me and I was about to lose it when I saw what’s written on its side “Jesus Owns You” and it spells JOY.

So simple.  3-letter word.  3 words.  Says it all.  It occurred to me how we all strive and struggle to be happy, to find peace, to be filled with joy – the joy that the world can never ever take away from us.  We search, we seek, we ask, we knock yet often we are left asking for more or asking more questions.  All along, what Jesus is telling us, what God wants from us, is to be owned by Him – yet we cannot have that.  I am my own, this is my life – don’t we all say that and live that?  I want joy but I want my life to be my own as well.  Hmm… I really don’t know how we can work around that when JOY is simply being owned by Jesus.

What does it mean to be owned by Jesus and why do most of us resist?

To be owned even just by someone is to be a slave of that person, to obey and act on that person’s commands.  Didn’t God give me

Continue reading

Only God

Only You can see my tears and know exactly what they mean;

And only You can wipe these tears and fill this empty space within;

Because only You know what’s in my heart and give exactly what it needs;

Only You can steady this heart and bring back the peace within. 

© April 30, 2017

March-ing by

Since this month started, seems like things were going fast.  Lent arrived and then – boom!  A week left of the month and I wonder where have I been?  I mix up days, forget dates, here but absent.  My mind drifting and sometimes shutting down.  I’m staring but not really seeing.  And right now, my body screams STOP!!!- but I cannot.  There are things needed to be done and things I wanted done.  I haven’t prepared a draft for my blog post this March.  I haven’t picked up the book I was reading.  I haven’t been sleeping at the designated time I wanted to, not getting enough hours of sleep.  Seems like I’m running after time.  Just like that, the days are marching past me.

I am overwhelmed as soon as I shifted my eyes away from God and focused on this world.  I am downcast as soon as I turned my back to His Word and embraced the world.

Last night brought me so much consolation.  His Word that is truly alive and active and accomplishes its purpose.

PSALM 27

[Of David] Yahweh is my light and my salvation, whom should I fear? Yahweh is the fortress of my life, whom should I dread?  When the wicked advance against me to eat me up, they, my opponents, my enemies, are the ones who stumble and fall. Though an army pitch camp against me, my heart will not fear, though war break out against me, my trust will never be shaken.  One thing I ask of Yahweh, one thing I seek: to dwell in Yahweh’s house all the days of my life, to enjoy the sweetness of Yahweh, to seek out his temple.  For he hides me away under his roof on the day of evil, he folds me in the recesses of his tent, sets me high on a rock.

Now my head is held high above the enemies who surround me; in his tent I will offer sacrifices of acclaim. I will sing, I will make music for Yahweh.  Yahweh, hear my voice as I cry, pity me, answer me!

Of you my heart has said, ‘Seek his face!‘ Your face, Yahweh, I seek;  do not turn away from me. Do not thrust aside your servant in anger, without you I am helpless. Never leave me, never forsake me, God, my Saviour.  Though my father and mother forsake me, Yahweh will gather me up.

Yahweh, teach me your way, lead me on the path of integrity because of my enemies; do not abandon me to the will of my foes — false witnesses have risen against me, and are breathing out violence.  This I believe: I shall see the goodness of Yahweh, in the land of the living.  Put your hope in Yahweh, be strong, let your heart be bold, put your hope in Yahweh.

 

When you’re not okay and yet you have to show up and be okay.  I don’t know which is worse, that or not being okay.

 

Pray for the Books You Read

When I need some distraction from thoughts I cannot run away from; when I want a companion who doesn’t judge and just let me listen because at times I have no words left to say; when I want perspectives and life-lessons given me without even the hint of trying hard and or justification – I pick up a book and read.  And I am always amazed at the things I get out of it.  The things speaking right at me, telling me what I need to hear.  That when I put down one, I have the sense of a renewed mind and spirit.

The books we read, that we pick up, matter.  And it is as important to pray for those that we read as praying for other necessities in life.  Because what we read affects us, influences us, changes us.  May God lead us to more literature that will help us become better and not bitter, at peace and not tempted, joyful and not depressed, informed and not deluded.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Philippians 4:8

Living on a Prayer

So you should pray like this:
“Our Father in heaven,
may your name be held holy,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread,
And forgive us our debts,
as we have forgiven those who are in debts to us.
And do not put us to the test,
but save us from the evil one.”

– Matthew 6:9-13

And this is how we ought to pray.  Not by memorizing the Lord’s prayer but by truly understanding what it meant.

To declare His glory and to make known His love; to submit to His will; to ask not only for the daily provisions of life but for the bread of life as well – the Word of God, the presence of Jesus in our lives; to forgive others and acknowledge that we are sinners and humbly lay down our sins at the feet of the cross; to pray for strength for we know that our flesh is weak; to acknowledge our salvation.

When we find it in our hearts struggling to submit to His will, or to forgive – let us pray for these struggles because we are weak and He is strong.  Let us not depend on our strength but rely on His.  And in times we do not know what to pray, or when we even cannot utter a single word to pray, a tear drop is a prayer that the Lord fully comprehend.  A deep sigh from a tired soul, a silence, a sob from a broken heart – all these and more the Lord sees and hears as our prayers.

The Spirit too comes to help us in our weakness.  For when we cannot choose words in order to pray properly, the Spirit himself expresses our plea in a way that could never be put into words, and God who knows everything in our heart knows perfectly well what he means, and that the pleas of the saints expressed by the Spirit are according to the mind of God.
– Romans 8:26-27

Pray, and listen.  The Lord delights in speaking to us when we pray.

When we take our time and delay before acting, that can be prudent and wise, but then that can also be plain laziness.  When we consider something over and over, that can be prudent and wise, but then that can also be indecisiveness.  When we hold our tongue when insulted, that can be prudent and wise, but then can also be cowardice in disguise.  The reason behind our actions, the state of our hearts when we decide, is the true indication of wisdom and prudence.

Who is the prudent man?  He is cautious, shows discretion, has discernment, and makes sound judgement.  He does not delay for the sake of delaying or think long because he cannot decide but he is tactful in his considerations, decides with discernment and considers not only the now but what his action or inaction can lead to.

Prudence cannot be without wisdom and vice versa.  In fact, in Proverbs 8:12 (NIV) Continue reading

Amate i Vostri Nemici

Love your enemies.

Simple.  Direct.  Crazy.  But, why should I?  How could I?

In theory, it’s already hard to postulate.  In practice, what more?  The world sees this as the craziest idea – a world that demands justice, revenge, vengeance sugar-coated into something we sometimes use as ‘I’m just teaching him a lesson’ or ‘He deserves it’.  Oh, how kind of us, teaching lessons, giving deserving presents!  And the world who loves gossips and dramas would be against a person who quietly accepts persecution and forgives – corny, boring, stupid.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for an eye, and tooth for tooth.’  But I tell you, do not resist an evil person.  If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.  And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.  If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles.  Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.” Matthew 5:38 – 42

Personally, I struggle with this command.  It’s just too hard to comprehend and it goes against lessons the society has taught me growing up.  I look at a society that demands Continue reading

BLEST ARE THE MERCIFUL

BLEST ARE THE MERCIFUL

Truly, God, in His Mercy, takes care and provides for His flock.  For me to be able to join the recent World Youth Day in Krakow is a miracle in itself.  He has converted the ‘yes’ into a possibility.  I had my reservations going into this trip – with all the chaos going on in most parts of Europe, then as we were nearing our departure via Turkish Airlines, there was bombing in the airport followed by a failed coup less than a week before we leave.  The trials never stopped there but with the loving mercy of our Lord, He has went ahead and prepared a way for us.

20160725_141526

St. Stephen’s Cathedral, Litomerice, Czech Republic.

 Everything that comes into our lives is a moment of encounter with God.

From the homily by Fr. Bert during the Eucharistic celebration last July 25, 2016 at the St. Stephen’s Cathedral in Litomerice, Czech Republic.

It’s not only in the extravagant events or in the ‘fireworks display moment of our lives’ that we encounter God but also in the little moments and sometimes, for us, trivial events that He is there, nudging us, knocking in our hearts, presenting Himself to be recognized by our soul.  And it is easy to be distracted and to not see God in the midst of the noise and the activities, with the world presenting you with so much diversions, with sceneries and oh the potatoes. When we were reminded that Continue reading

People can love you to the moon and back and you’d still get disappointed with them.  God loves you to the moon and beyond and He never disappoints.
09.22.15 ©djklmnopi

Thoughts Before Falling Asleep

Skimming the surface, most of us go through life like this.  We see a man cross the street, dropped his coin, went back to pick up his coin and block an incoming car.  What a stupid man!  On the surface, he values the coin more than his life.  How easy it is for us to draw conclusions and pass on judgments on events and people just because of what we see.  Going deeper is too complicated, too much effort and such a waste of time.  To ask “maybe”, to consider for a split second and to ponder about this man’s life – too much!  Yet, this man has  a story, his coin has a story, his crossing the street has a story – or maybe, it’s simply just that, he just wanted to cross the street, dropped the coin and decided he loves the coin more than his life – stupid man.  Or what about the driver of the incoming car?  The hustle and bustle of life, the busy-ness that we have plunged ourselves into, has made us skim surfaces and move on without taking a second look, without having second thoughts.  Like the wind passing through a tree, blowing the leaves off their branches without looking back, leaving the tree and leaves with their own stories.

Stop and smell the flowers.  Slow down and appreciate life.  Skimming the surface makes you miss out on the beauty of an ice cream cake stuffed with your favorite fruits and flavors.  It doesn’t hurt to go deeper, to look beyond – there’s always so much more than what meets the eye.

Be quick to consider and slow to judge.